“Dear future husband…” Okay, wait a second. Finding Mr. Right is hard enough! How can you write to the guy before he’s even materialized?
Well, there are two different approaches you could take.
First up, you could pen a letter to an actual person, such as your current fiancé or boyfriend. In this case, you can add their email address in FutureMe so that they'll receive it at the date our choose. In this case, your letter’s likely to be based around your shared experiences in your relationship.
Or, you can write a letter to a person you haven't met yet, in which case you’ll simply send it to your own email address. Since you don’t know who the mystery man will be, you can get as creative as you like, imagining the sound of their laugh, or how you’ll spend time together. Then, when you receive the letter, you can read what you wrote to your future love — and, if you’ve found the man you want to be with, you can share it with him too. Fun!
In any case, here are a few tips to get you started.
Tips for writing a letter to your future husband
1. Be honest with your future boo
Whether you're writing for an actual person or an imaginary one, don't treat the letter like fiction. Sure, there's nothing wrong with doing this as a writing exercise, but the point here is to write a genuine letter.
Be honest with your future bae like you would with a real partner. You might talk about what matters to you in a relationship, what you hope for your wedding and even your crazy dream of climbing Everest with your soulmate.
You might also talk about you limitations: how you handle tough days, how to calm you down when you’re angry, and what you do to overcome a bad day.
You might explain what love means to you and your biggest hopes and dreams for your life together.
You could share feelings about what you deserve in order to be your best version of yourself, or simply reveal what you do to overcome a bad day, and what’s your hope for this world.
Whatever you decide to cover, start with, “Dear future husband”, and imagine yourself as the future wife to get the ball rolling.
2. See him as a human being rather than a “dream husband”
Be real! Your future man is going to be many things — he may even be the best thing that happens in your life — but even so, he’s not going to be Super Man. Sorry!
It’s easy to think, “My letter to my future husband is a letter to Mr Perfect”, but even the most incredible among us have our faults. So treat your letter recipient as a human being rather than an idealized caricature, and bring your self-respect to the game.
3. Stay positive but realistic
Of course you’re going to be positive in what you write — this whole process should ideally bring you joy! — but it’s also important to be realistic about the trials and tribulations of long-term relationships.
There are definitely going to be rough times every now and then; what matters is how you’ll get past those together. Some ideas on how you’ll do that might make a worthy addition to your letter.
4. Remember: marriage is a partnership
You know those types who seem to spend their life dreaming of their wedding day? Think past it. Marriage is a partnership, and it’s forever. So, look forward and consider where you think your partnership will be when this message arrives. You might find yourself writing something like, “Hopefully, by now, we’re ready to settle and create a wonderful life together, and a beautiful family.”
5. Just. Be. You.
Don't try to impress your future husband in your letter. Just be yourself. After all, he fell in love and married (or will marry) you. By the time this arrives, he’ll be sharing his life and his world with you. So, be yourself!
Types of letters
At a loss for words? Perhaps a more focused theme would help you. Here are some we prepared earlier!
A promise letter
This type of letter is pretty straightforward. As the name suggests, you write a list of promises to your dear future husband that you are sure to keep. No maybe’s! Think of it as being like penning your wedding day vows. And if they’ve already been written and read? Use the letter to ask your husband if he feels you stayed true to them.
A love letter
This is the most common approach, since it just feels natural, limitless and expressive. There are no rules to follow except your heart. However, if you’re a bit lost for words, try these sentence-starters:
“I love you because…”
“I knew I loved you the moment we…”
“Despite some rough chapters in our relationship, I kept loving you because…”
“My definitions of love are…”
An anniversary letter
Hey, if your anniversary is coming up, this is the perfect way to put a smile on your partner’s face. It’s a profound and creative gift for the man you plan to marry some day. He’s sure to be grateful for it!
A letter of encouragement
Newsflash! Your letter doesn't have to be romantic. Just like sending a letter of encouragement to your future self, you can send a pep talk to your man. He’s going to love to hear how proud you are of his accomplishments, and how much you love him just for the incredible person he is.
We hope this helped! Ready to begin? Write your letter now.